The Liberals' Feckless Opposition To Trump: A Rant

The liberal response to Donald Trump has been nothing short of infantile. They can act any way they want, I can’t tell them any differently, but it’s not doing anything to get Trump out of office. I’ve tried explaining it to them for the last four years, but they’ve had their fingers in their ears and been screaming, “Nyah, nyah, I can’t hear you, Russian bot.”

The problem with an infantile mindset is that infants are not capable of doing anything for themselves. The best an infant can do is cry and hope one of its parents comes and takes care of the problem for them. That’s what liberals are doing now. They shriek in the hopes that someone will take care of the dirty diaper that is their president.

In the absence of actual parents, they glom on to any authority figure they hope will fight their fight for them. Enter Daddy Deepstate. For four years he’s been yanking their chain and they’ve been lapping it up. “The authorities are going to come and take care of the big bad monster,” they say. It’s been four years yet and nothing’s been done, but you know how kids are able to watch the same damn movie night after night for years.

Yeah, they’ve got the TV on in the background while the grownups are busy trying to do grownup stuff. I’ve heard the same damn story hundreds of times already. I’ve seen their little eyes get all wide when the lady on TV announces a bombshell. They get up and do their little happy dance in their footie pyjamas as the good witch says she’s going to lasso the orange ogre at last. She mixes powerful incantations into her speech, words like “if true”, “allegedly”, and “unnamed sources”.

But it always ends in disappointment. The ogre gets away in the end.  

Which they should know! Because they watch the same damn video EVERY FREAKING NIGHT! If someone would please buy them another video to watch.

Do they really think the latest evidence-free assertion from anonymous sources is going to be what brings down Trump? Has Daddy Deepstate and Mommy Media ever really done anything for you? But you know how kids tend to obsess over purple dinosaurs and the like. You can’t tell them it’s just a guy in a purple suit. And he's singing their song: "I love you, You love me, Trump and his supporters are SCUM!"

The thing is, all the liberals have to do to take down Trump is get out of his way and let him stumble down the ramp in front of his legions. There’s an exploding debt, a crashing economy, and a completely inept handling of a pandemic. All they have to do is step back a little bit and let happen what will come naturally. Just shut up and let the big oaf expose himself.

BUT THEY JUST CAN’T HELP THEMSELVES! They try to attack Trump, but they are only capable of doing so in the most atrocious ways. And in the process, they are making themselves repugnant to both the centrists and the far left, the two voting blocs they most require. Calling anti-war activists “Putin puppets” is doing nothing to win their vote.

Dear God, watching liberals get outmaneuvered by Trump is like watching some guy lose a wrestling match to an oversized stuffed bear. In a pit of filth. You ask yourself how it's even possible, but time after time you watch as liberals somehow end up on their backs gasping in the filth with the bear perched upon their chest, a mindless grin on its face and not a drop of crud on its fur. IT’S A STUFFED BEAR! HOW CAN YOU BE LOSING TO A STUFFED BEAR? But no sooner does the next round begin than they somehow get all tangled up in their Kente cloth and the bear’s again on top of them and they turn purple at the indignity of it all. It’s hard not to laugh, people. Harder still not to turn the channel.

I find myself wishing Jerry Springer still had a show so I could watch something a little less repulsive. I find myself wishing the Democrats had someone a little less insane than Adam Schiff, like say Joe McCarthy. I wish they had a more youthful and vibrant candidate, like Bernie Sanders, or a more charismatic one, like Walter Mondale. Or even just a better strategist, like Charles Manson.

If Trump gets reelected, I want liberals to promise me something: stay out of his way. Because I guarantee you before his second term is ended, his own supporters will force him to resign. That’s how incompetent he is. The only reason he’s made it this far is because they hate the alternative and are willing to blame everything on them. And because your total ineptness to oppose him in any meaningful way has given people who don’t like Trump no reason to join with you. Trump has only made it this far with your help.

Okay, rant over. You can take your fingers out of your ears now.

Like my writing? Please follow me on Twitter or Facebook, sign up for my newsletter, or check me out on Amazon.